House of Bren: Adult Love Letters

I haven’t received a love letter from a boy in a really long time.

Not the kind a girl likes to get anyways. You know, check the box type thing were the mean option of “NO” appears and probably checked off. That actually happened to me once, in 3rd grade.

That’s a sad story today, because the little blond hair, blue eyed boy who said no to me, is severely injured from battle wounds in Iraq. My heart was broken when I got the news two weeks ago.

I’m praying for him.

I’m an adult now (I think), with real feelings and real love requests. Few have really been met. Which is sad, too. But, every now and then, a man that I’m not emotionally attached to, will send me a the kind of love letter that I really prefer.

It’s the kind of love letter that pays my bills!

Now, how’s that for an upgrade? Traditional love letters are mushy, probably a whole bunch of smoke being blown up my ass–who needs that? I prefer the ones that will make me feel all grown up, and sexy and valuable and yes, ones that will put some money in my pocket!

Take this one here for instance:

“Brenda, Interested? Seems to be right up your alley
—— Forwarded Message
From: XXX
Date: Tue, 1 Apr 2008 09:34:03 -0400
To: XXX
Subject: Trinidad and Tobago’s Culinary Festival Invite
Dear Nick,
I’d like to invite you to join me on a culinary press trip to the beautiful dual island nation of Trinidad & Tobago in the West Indies, May *****, 2008. The idea of this trip is to feature the food that represents the many cultures that make up the people of Trinidad & Tobago. This trip should appeal to anyone who writes for major consumer publications that report on, culinary travel and active lifestyles, and in-style, “must see” yet, virtually undiscovered vacation destinations.
Trinidad & Tobago is one of the few places in the world that offers visitors such a wide and varied array of ethnic festivals, events, and activities. In addition to attending the annual “Taste T&T” culinary festival, the trip will also include visits to Trinidad’s natural tourist attractions such as rain forests and bird sanctuaries. We will travel around the island and learn about the wide and varied array of ethnic cuisine available and the colorful history that has left a culinary influence of Arabic, Spanish, African, Chinese, Polynesian, Thai, Indian, Cajun, and indigenous Amerindian in the food of Trinidad & Tobago.
Participants will have the opportunity to experience some of the best dining in the Caribbean and the warm, welcoming Trinidad hospitality at every corner of this island paradise.
Your host is the Trinidad & Tobago Tourism board and you will be escorted by a CAMC representative. Airfare will be provided to journalists with firm assignments from major consumer publications as well as meals and activities on the itinerary. Space is limited on this press trip. Only those travel writers with firm assignments will be considered. Please contact me if you have any questions and check out the T&T website at www.goTrinidadandTobago.com http://www.gotrinidadandtobago.com .
Best, XXXXX “

Yeah baby! This girl here is off to Trini and Tobago to eat like a fool! I’m going to eat, wine, eat, skinny dip, eat some more and sip on sex on the beach. I’d actually have the latter but that right boy still doesn’t exist in my world. OH well, his loss, not mine!

I’m going to soak in the sun and really clutch on to this love letter. This love letter will go in my memory box, along with the hotel room keys, valentine’s day cards, cards from delivered flowers and any other love thing that is close to my heart.

Only this love letter here will not result in reminiscent pain or unrecoverable expenses from being involved with someone thousands of miles away. This love letter
will bring me joy, it will bring me a tan and a happy belly!

Oh Nick, won’t you send me another love letter?

Yours truly,

A loving girl named Bren